The Law of Internal Annihilation: The Paradox of the Surviving Entity | didisdna

The automated counter-strike of trauma

Surviving annihilation

Why is it..

That time and time again..

I sabotage myself.

…

Every

Single

Effort

That I make

To grant myself some worth..

Or to actually try to be me..

Is met with..

And counteracted to with..

An excruciating need to

Self sabotage

Self harm

Self loath

…

And finally..

Self destruct

Every single aspect of those attempts..

Every

Single

Part

..of.. me

…

It is tiring..

To the extreme..

To be an entity..

That is trying to survive..

And trying to annihilate itself..

At the very same time.

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ᗪ𝒾∂เรᗪ𝔫ค©️MMXXI

Epilogue: The Law of Internal Annihilation

“When a system is conditioned to equate self-worth with certain death, survival becomes a form of treason. The law of internal annihilation dictates that the closer an ‘entity’ gets to its own core, the more violent the defensive hardware strikes to erase the progress. To exist in a state where one is simultaneously the rescuer and the executioner is the ultimate form of human exhaustion. Yet, the fact that there is still an ‘effort’ being made proves that the drive to survive is fundamentally stronger than the program of destruction. Annihilation is a process, but the ‘me’ is a constant. didisdna.”